MY HUSBAND, MY DETRACTOR

Whilst in conversation with a mum the other day she told me that her husband wasn't supportive of her interest in coaching or NLP because he thought it was airy fairy.  It took me straight back.  To the many conversations and situations dotted throughout my relationship with my ex where I found myself in exactly the same position.  'Coaching was hippie'ish' 'I shouldn't expect any money to put into a business' It's great you've achieved this but what's it worth?'

I can't recall a time when I felt truly understood or supported by my ex and the reason was that he was Mr Practical and I was Mrs Passionate.  He believed that you worked to provide for your family and that if you enjoyed it, then that was a bonus.  I believed, and still do, that you only get one life and you should try to do what you truly love and makes you happy. 

This is a fab way to live life if you are single but what happens when worlds collide?  Who backs down?  Who gets to make the decisions?  Where is the compromise?  Because my partner was so traditional he assumed because he made the money (I was working part-time in a pub and looking after our daughter) he was in charge of spending it; and it wasn't on my business.  Arguments were futile as he was only interested in business plans and forecasts, as if these were the only indicators of business success.  

So, how did we work things out?  Well, I wish I could sum this blog up with a neat little tip on how to deal with a conflict like this but in the end, for he and I, there was only separation.  Our views on business and life were just too different.  I would much rather live on a modest income and pursue those things in life that make me truly happy, trusting my gut and not just the facts and figures.  And to this day I'm still running my business and I love, love, love it!

Also in this series: Leaving the Country with Daughter, but not Dad

MY LIFE; LIKE A SERVANT IN THE 'OLDEN DAYS'

I have been feeling tired today - doggone tired, tired in my bones.

I am tired of housework, kids, being responsible, always having to think three steps in advance, never being able to stop as things will just pile up, running a business, keeping up with emails, blogging, tweeting, worrying about money, trying to make to make it stretch, organising and managing...

Feeling this way made me take a longing look into the past when I was a twenty-something single gal with nothing to worry about except making it to work on time.  Weekends stretched on, holidays were bliss.  I was the epitome of footloose and fancy free. 

Now, as you can imagine, feeling tired and worn-down and reminiscing about your past isn't conducive to an upbeat frame of mind but I was saved by a revelation.  While scrubbing at the crusty dishes tonight it dawned on me that my life now had parellels to those of a servant in the 'olden days'.  Not that I am often tied up in an apron scrubbing at floors and drawing baths for people but that I am engaged in activity of some sort from very early in the morning to late at night. 

You would think this connection might sink me into a deeper depression but it had the opposite effect.  It helped me see that I am so lucky as the housework I do is in my house, I am wiping the noses of my kids, I am balancing the books on my business and I above all, I was lucky enough to choose this life.  Plus, there's also that little added bonus that my life expectancy is a hell of a lot longer!